Thursday, March 6, 2008

Tell Me Something Good

I’m a pessimist. I think McCain’s going to win—or, worse, maybe a year from now I’m going to wish McCain had won.

Gas prices and home foreclosures are at an all-time high. If you lose your home, you may not even be able to afford to live in your car.

The US dollar has dropped to an all-time low. Every dollar I earned today is now worth just under 66 cents.

People are on edge. Even normally nice people are beginning to develop shark eyes. All my friends seem depressed.

Patrick Swayze has weeks to live. Maybe. People will make jokes about this, Just as they did about Heath. \

My dog is getting old. My car is getting old. The city where I live is running out of water. Kind of a necessity, I hear. I am falling apart.

American soldiers in Afghanistan are depressed. An Army report released today recommends sending civilian psychiatrists to the front to address the growing demand.

Strawberries don’t taste like strawberries anymore. They taste like Dasani strawberry-flavored water. And I fear I may have eaten my last tomato with any flavor at all.

We’re halfway through the present semester, and even my brightest students in Argument-based Research cannot recognize an argument when they read one.

Kids are zombified on Adderall and Ritalin. In class, away from their computers, cell phones, and plasma-screen TVs, they take on the aspect of unplugged appliances.

Today the FBI admitted that in 2006 it improperly accessed Americans’ phone records, credit histories, and Internet use. And is this something that somebody has fixed now?

The White House is fighting to the finish to keep its own spying records (since 2000) off the record. Freedom and privacy are not worth the paper they’re printed on.

Today 97 percent of stock shares closed in the negative. Bombing in Times Square. Seminary shootings in Jerusalem. The President dances like a Teletubby on YouTube.

No comments:

Post a Comment


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...